My Fried Rice Sucks So Does My Yoruba
On Saturday, my overly eager-to-please self invited a long-time friend of mine to dinner. Before he even confirmed, I dragged my butt off to the farmer's market in addition to the regular grocery store to do my bi-weekly shopping. My goal was to make egg rolls and spicy sauce for appetizers, a huge salad with fried rice, plantains, and baked hen for the entree and fruit for dessert. Yeah, by the time you go through all that food, I'm not about to kill anyone with a ‘bad’ dessert.
If there's one thing I can usually make, it's fried rice. It’s what I make when I have people over and I don’t want to have to think of anything complicated that my Naija friends wouldn’t like. Trust me, I’ve gotten in trouble for thinking outside the box or being creative. Anyway, fried rice is what I’m good at. I mean, when I lived with my sisters, I would be the one to make the fried rice and my older sister would make the jollof rice whenever we had parties. These days, at least my last two attempts, my fried rice just sucks. No matter what method I try - the sautéing of the rice and adding veggies and other ingredients later or the sautéing of the veggies and separate parboiling (why do they call it that?) of the rice and mixing the two together - nothing works anymore. My fried rice just sucks. In fact, my biggest fan, DH had no comments this time around. He usually says it's good when I complain that it sucks but this time, he ate in silence and so far, he's only eaten one plate out of an entire pot! It must suck really bad. I need a new MO. Thank God my friend wasn’t able to make it to witness the disaster that was my fried rice. For what it’s worth, my baked hen was pretty good if I may say so.
On to my Yoruba. It just sucks majorly. I can't speak Yoruba anymore to save my life. My girlfriend called me at work to talk about business opportunities that she's exploring as well as other things of a personal nature. Because she was at work and didn’t want people around her eavesdropping on our conversation, she asked me to 'code' in Yoruba. I tried my best but my best involved one Yoruba word per sentence. Even though our gist was salacious and sweet, I had to cut it short because I couldn’t hang in Yoruba. I hung up feeling terrible. All my dad’s efforts have come to this. How are my kids ever going to learn Yoruba? I’ve also been thinking: Do most parents want their children to understand their native language? I think it would be nice but then again mine sucks so my expectations will be very low.
posted by Gbemi's Piece @ 1:38 PM
4 Comments:
I feel you. I was always good at Yoruba and used to make fun of my sis for not being able to hang but I find myself losing it quickly because I don't speak it as much. It's getting serious so that now when I speak to folks back home I take evry opportunity to speak it. I'm trying to hold on but man, it's hard. And I think I'd like for my kids to be able to speak Yoruba as well as other languages.
Per the Yoruba...I too found it slipping from my grasps - what I have been doing now is I watch Yoruba movies...some of them more than once. I even now have some owes (proverbs) up my sleeves - iku lo meja kako (don't try me). I was never good at it anyway and I am used to being made fun of but still...like you...I am making an extra effort for the kids' sake.
Per the fried rice, you sound just like me. You know when you have done something so many times it is almost like second nature and then all of a sudden, it is like you don't know how to ride that bike again. The latest way, I have been making fried rice is parboiling the rice just enough that it is not too hard and not too soft and then I stir fry all the veggies and add mix in the rice. If I am adding any chicken, liver, shrimp, etc...that goes in last after the rice is in and let it simmer. The key is to make sure that neither the rice or the veggies are overcooked...otherwise it can look all mushy. This is sometimes difficult if you are doing multiple things in the kitchen and you just firget either the rice or the veggies on the stovetop and once either are soggy, you have reached the point of no return. Hope this helps
Ms. May - I laughed at your expression: "trying to hold on". That's too funny. But for real, that's what I am trying to do, hold on to this thing called my 'native' language.
Jola - I like the idea of watching Yoruba movies. I can imagine using some owes on my kids in the future. Their dad would be so shocked. Thanks so much for going through the trouble of sharing your way of making fried rice. I was seriously hoping someone would read between the lines and share their recipe. Now, what seasoning do you use? I think that might also make a difference. Thanks in advance!
I feel you..I learnt most of my igbo as an adult, through watching igbo movies and listening to igbo music( have y'all heard about aka nchawa its some really local gospel music). Its really embarassing when you can't code in your language but it not too late.I remember my cousin in jand, she tried to tell her mum something infront of her oyibo head teacher and she just didnt know the words in her language , the experience made her go all out and now she is quite fluent. It doesnt matter if people laugh at your weak yoruba accent or your misprounciation just speak..Me when I mess up my ibo i just form aje butter and learn from my mistakes. I know you guys don't really have househelps there but for me..I try and employ igbo helps not because I am tribalistic but because I want them to speak igbo to my kids and believe me it has worked.The one time i had a hause help I made her speak hausa to my kids and they picked it fast. The househelp I just got can hardly speak english so even i have to speak igbo to her all the time, so not only are my kids learning my own skills are improving. Infact my 3year old pretty much understands most things and has started speaking igbo.so I agree with jola movies help (half of the yoruba I know is from movies and yoruba gospel songs).Also speak the small one you know to your kids even if its just "mofe lo to" or "e bin pami they know or all the greetings its a start.I get sad when I ask a kid kedu(how are you in igbo) and they have no idea what i just said.What even makes me moe sad is how alot of people who speak their tribal tongue fluently delibrately dont teach their kids (Oh I don't want my child to have a calabar accent!)it makes no sense to me, but I don't blame them because they don't know how embarrasing it can be not to be fluent in ones language.I mean as a child i couldn't speak to my grand mum unless i was greeting her.I always look at hispanic people and are motivated by them.
I am actually suprised you guys abroad r loosing your language skills cus when I am in houston(where my brothers live) I speak more ibo than I speak at home, because everybody you see is just itching to speak their local dialect.Maybe your don't know many Nigerians( I know Nigerians can be annoying) but atimes it may be necessary to associate with Nigerians for the sake of preserving our culture. My family friends in columbus speak fluent igbo and it helped that their dad was very active in his hometown/Nigerian activities in the States. Even if our kids can't speak let them understand and they can build up on that.
Good luck with your fried rice,one piece of advice when you cook..relax when you worry about how the food will turn ougt, it ruins it.
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